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R/E/P => R/E/P Archives => j. hall => Topic started by: NelsonL on March 26, 2007, 02:03:12 pm

Title: session quotes
Post by: NelsonL on March 26, 2007, 02:03:12 pm
"Why would I bring my guitar cables, this is a studio."

&

"Make the kick less resonant and we'll just add reverb later."

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on March 26, 2007, 02:24:47 pm
"can you put some trem-mellow on my guitar?"

"if i play each drum, can you just edit my beats together?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 26, 2007, 02:27:17 pm
Smile first is quite adequate notice:)
second is stupid crap:)

I sometimes work with hip-hop and i can remember even more stupid things: "Why it is dificult to record that rock bands? Oh i used to hear what they recording all that instrument by instrument" Smile Sometimes i hear such things about surround from people downloading AC3 encoded music:
"oh i think it is avesome, sounds like recorded with 4 mics:)"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rankus on March 26, 2007, 02:27:26 pm


"I'll just sing anywhere and then you can put it where it's supposed to be"  (rapper)


Great thread topic!

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: el duderino on March 26, 2007, 02:30:31 pm
"Would it help him sing better if I took my top off?"- the answer was yes in case you were wondering.

"It smells like A&R in here"



Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 26, 2007, 02:30:33 pm
j.hall wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 13:24

"can you put some trem-mellow on my guitar?"



trem-mellow? what is this? tremolo?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 26, 2007, 02:35:23 pm
Rappers: "Band members going inside and outside of vocal cabin while recording:)"

"Singers sometimes have no clue what they need to sing to the mic and not turn head all the time"

"oh this plug looks nice can we try to put it on vocal?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 26, 2007, 02:41:27 pm
Some drummer puted floor tom and Ride before HH. So it is:

Floor Tom, Ride, HH, Crash1 Snare, Rack Tom1, Rack Tom2

Question: how would you place overheead mics in that case? As it was some quick and live recording (used 4 mics). I usually have all kit micked but if they don't want to pay much i do live records as well for half price.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 26, 2007, 02:50:46 pm
"Why i cannot hear what i have played here? can you make it louder?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: redfro on March 26, 2007, 09:08:32 pm
Swear to god....






"I'm a great drummer. I just have a problem with time."








Wow.....
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on March 26, 2007, 09:20:35 pm
Vladislavs Korehovs wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 13:30

j.hall wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 13:24

"can you put some trem-mellow on my guitar?"



trem-mellow? what is this? tremolo?


yeah, tremolo, but the guy pronounced it like this:

Tra mellow

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: mcsnare on March 26, 2007, 09:37:18 pm
A guy called and asked the studio manager:" Do you have the big Pro Tool?"

Client asks the engineer on a session "Can you put some of that mad extortion on my vocal?"

Both true.
Dave
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: marcel on March 26, 2007, 09:47:36 pm
This happened to a friend of mine...

Rapper, gesturing excitedly toward the SSL 9000 in front of him:

"Where da button at?"

Best, Marcel

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: marcel on March 26, 2007, 09:59:09 pm
redfro wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 18:08

Swear to god....






"I'm a great drummer. I just have a problem with time."








Wow.....


Wicked...

Even in the digital format, your recording has captured the full irony of the statement...

Best, Marcel
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on March 27, 2007, 03:41:08 pm
"Yo god, my ass is stuck in this chair fa reyill, god"
-overweight rapper.... stuck in chair

"uhm.... we all knew she couldn't sing"
-engineer to president of record label

"see.... in this business you have to have longvangevity"
-rap bodyguard

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Version on March 27, 2007, 03:44:54 pm
"When I look at the drum kit, I just see a series of mistakes about to be made."

drummer to me.
I just didn't say anything.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: NelsonL on March 27, 2007, 04:14:49 pm
mcsnare wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 18:37

A guy called and asked the studio manager:" Do you have the big Pro Tool?"

Client asks the engineer on a session "Can you put some of that mad extortion on my vocal?"

Both true.
Dave


Heh!!

After we get an Aurora 16, we're gonna start saving for the big Pro Tool.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: marcel on March 27, 2007, 07:12:15 pm
Assistant, to engineer:

If he wants his band to sound like Joy Division so bad, why doesn't he just kill himself?

I love this thread...

Best, Marcel
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: NelsonL on March 27, 2007, 07:32:45 pm
Guitar player to bandmates, cymbal wash and last chord are still ringing out-- as heard in the OH's and room mic:

"I f*%$ed up."

Naturally his mistake was completely isolated... until he opened his mouth.

Also, it was the only keeper drum take.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on March 28, 2007, 02:29:47 am
rattleyour wrote on Tue, 27 March 2007 18:32

Guitar player to bandmates, cymbal wash and last chord are still ringing out-- as heard in the OH's and room mic:

"I f*%$ed up."

Naturally his mistake was completely isolated... until he opened his mouth.

Also, it was the only keeper drum take.



I would leave this small artifact to better reproduce the feel of the song.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: NelsonL on March 28, 2007, 01:27:44 pm
Vladislavs Korehovs wrote on Tue, 27 March 2007 23:29

rattleyour wrote on Tue, 27 March 2007 18:32

Guitar player to bandmates, cymbal wash and last chord are still ringing out-- as heard in the OH's and room mic:

"I f*%$ed up."

Naturally his mistake was completely isolated... until he opened his mouth.

Also, it was the only keeper drum take.



I would leave this small artifact to better reproduce the feel of the song.


Band to me regarding the above, and several occasions where the drummer audibly counted out the beat as the cymblas rang out:

"You can take that out, right?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rankus on March 28, 2007, 02:25:44 pm
rattleyour wrote on Wed, 28 March 2007 10:27



Band to me regarding the above, and several occasions where the drummer audibly counted out the beat as the cymblas rang out:

"You can take that out, right?"



My reply in these instances: "It's adding character... you know, like the mole on the supermodels face... you don't want to lose that do you?"   Cool
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on March 29, 2007, 06:41:29 pm
band to me, "great mix, we just need to change a few tiny things here and there"

me to the band, "feel free to ruin the song........"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on March 29, 2007, 10:21:09 pm
man, we had a whole book of em going for a while.  I'll have to dig that up.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on March 30, 2007, 02:24:01 am
"so stereo means you hear the same thing from two speakers?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Thomas Lester on March 30, 2007, 11:40:25 am
During a gangsta' rap session.

Me:  (walk into the control room while taking a break, returning to start vocals)

Me:  (Look through the control room window into the dimmly lit live room to see the rapper behind the U47 with a wide stance and a 9mm pistol in his right hand, with his arms crossed across his chest)

Me:  "Is that a real gun?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Is it loaded?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Why are you holding a loaded gun?"

Rapper:  "I'm wrapping about killing people...  I want to feel like I have that power while I lay down the track.  It'll sound authentic."

Me:  "I'm not comfortable with this idea."

Rapper:  "I'm not rapping without the Gun."

Me:  (to the assistant), "get the studio manager to get their manager on the phone".

Me:  "Hold on a sec..."

We ended up agreeing to me keeping the clip and all the bullets.  He got to hold the gun.  Ironically...  the lyrics were about killing white guys.  I was the only white guy in the room....     Even with the bullets, I was feeling a bit uncomfortable...  I've got a picture of me with 9mm bullets lined up across the scribble strip of a VR72 somewhere.  I'll have to post it some time.

They were really great guys and the album turned out good and I did 2 more records with them over the following few years.  It was just that songs lyrics....
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rollmottle on March 30, 2007, 12:33:45 pm
Thomas Lester wrote on Fri, 30 March 2007 08:40

During a gangsta' rap session.

Me:  (walk into the control room while taking a break, returning to start vocals)

Me:  (Look through the control room window into the dimmly lit live room to see the rapper behind the U47 with a wide stance and a 9mm pistol in his right hand, with his arms crossed across his chest)

Me:  "Is that a real gun?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Is it loaded?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Why are you holding a loaded gun?"

Rapper:  "I'm wrapping about killing people...  I want to feel like I have that power while I lay down the track.  It'll sound authentic."

Me:  "I'm not comfortable with this idea."

Rapper:  "I'm not rapping without the Gun."

Me:  (to the assistant), "get the studio manager to get their manager on the phone".

Me:  "Hold on a sec..."

We ended up agreeing to me keeping the clip and all the bullets.  He got to hold the gun.  Ironically...  the lyrics were about killing white guys.  I was the only white guy in the room....     Even with the bullets, I was feeling a bit uncomfortable...  I've got a picture of me with 9mm bullets lined up across the scribble strip of a VR72 somewhere.  I'll have to post it some time.

They were really great guys and the album turned out good and I did 2 more records with them over the following few years.  It was just that songs lyrics....


Laughing  crazy.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on April 02, 2007, 10:31:26 pm
WHOA!!!!!!!!!

i've seen a lot of crazy things in the studio, but a loaded gun is not one of them.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 03, 2007, 01:20:09 pm
a friend of mine moved to california to take a job in a studio.

he was replacing an engineer who was murdered over a bad hip-hop mix.

he got there and said 'i think i've made a mistake'

he now works at hy-vee
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rankus on April 03, 2007, 02:01:40 pm
grant richard wrote on Tue, 03 April 2007 10:20




he was replacing an engineer who was murdered over a bad hip-hop mix.

he got there and said 'i think i've made a mistake!




What was his first clue? (LOL)



Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 03, 2007, 02:43:54 pm
he didn't know any of this til he got there.  all he knew was this

'hey, we need an engineer, one of our guys just left'

Sad sad story
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on April 03, 2007, 05:26:30 pm
grant richard wrote on Tue, 03 April 2007 12:20

a friend of mine moved to california to take a job in a studio.

he was replacing an engineer who was murdered over a bad hip-hop mix.

he got there and said 'i think i've made a mistake'

he now works at hy-vee

Unbeliveble...
What about those stupid rappers? Were they prosecuted?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 03, 2007, 09:26:19 pm
i believe they were, yes.  i think they were on the run for a while though.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on April 04, 2007, 11:44:58 am
Hy-Vee is a grocery store BTW.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: NelsonL on April 04, 2007, 12:31:52 pm
That reminds me of a quote from one of my studio partner's sessions. A guy from the nearby grocery store got to talking with Jeff in the checkout line and wound up booking some time to track vocals.

So he comes in with his girl, who's the singer, and they set to work.

After a few passes he reaches for the talk back button and says: "yeah, sprinkle some more of that Mariah Carey shit on there."

...and she did.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on April 04, 2007, 02:50:34 pm
producer on a record i just mixed used to work in a record store in his high school years.  one day, tall, muscular man enters and promptly blurts out, "where ya'll keep the shitty music at?"

from that story forward, the producer and main writer of the band would constantly be asking me "uh yeah, that sounds cool, but we want more of the shitty music in there......"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on April 04, 2007, 04:27:41 pm
Producer on a mix date :

"could you make that sound a little more Marvin Gaye and a little less just gay? "
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: el duderino on April 04, 2007, 05:20:41 pm
nice. that reminds of a hip hop session i was on....

the artists manager comes into the control room after we finish a take. The artists says "give me a minute i need to eat a lil something".

he pulls out some little muffin thing and takes a bite.

The manager asks, "what you eating?" artist replies," oh just a $.50 muffin" to which the manager replies, "50 cent has his owns muffin now?! damn!"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on April 04, 2007, 05:20:58 pm
M Carter wrote on Wed, 04 April 2007 15:27

Producer on a mix date :

"could you make that sound a little more Marvin Gaye and a little less just gay? "



BRILLIANT!!!!

I'd probably fall off my chair.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: chrisj on April 05, 2007, 12:31:59 pm
mcsnare wrote on Mon, 26 March 2007 21:37

A guy called and asked the studio manager:" Do you have the big Pro Tool?"

Client asks the engineer on a session "Can you put some of that mad extortion on my vocal?"

Both true.
Dave


The answers being, "Oh, yes" and "Certainly, for ten thousand dollars", right?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 05, 2007, 10:45:08 pm
i've got a big pro tool

sorry i had to go there
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on April 06, 2007, 12:38:47 pm
Yesterday i had a killer quote:
Guitarist: "why you don't have a flashing LED in sync with metronome, because i cannot play in time by listening metronome only"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 07, 2007, 12:18:09 am
HAHAHA
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Cult_Status02 on April 07, 2007, 01:56:28 am
I love this thread!

I run a small studio in a small town:

Rappers say: "No bloodz here!"

Me: You're gonna get shot

Rappers: Naw man, we cool.

Me: How old are you?

Rappers: Marvin turns 17 next month.

Ever since then I have made fun of the studio gangsters.  By the way, this conversation ended up with them saying "We're not callin' the bloodz out, we're just saying we're not bloodz."  So I asked "Are you crips then?"  There quick response was "no, not really."  I was speechless.

Rappers (and I hate this term for some reason, not sure how you guys feel as I'm new here.): "Can you school and chop this?"

Ohhh, another good rapper one (I think): "Yo roll that shit"
Me: "Just a sec."
Rappers forgetting mic is on: "If he messes this shit up I'm gonna throw down with him!"
Me: Get the fuck out of my studio.

This guy was the fat white boy that was rapping with "Marvin" from the earlier quote.

Besides the typical "You can fix that when you mix, right?" That particular rap group was the most fun.

Sorry for the length.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Vladislavs Korehovs on April 09, 2007, 06:53:49 am
grant richard wrote on Thu, 05 April 2007 21:45

i've got a big pro tool

sorry i had to go there

Smile))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on April 09, 2007, 11:34:12 am
Not to turn this into the 'dumb rapper quotes' thread but here's one I caught wind of the other day.


Rap Hanger-On #1 :  "Yo son, did he just say ratios?"
Rap Hanger-On #2 :  "Yeah son, that's that MATH shit"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: xpulsar on April 16, 2007, 05:06:06 am
Rap session , Major label stuff.

Rappers friend: Do it do beats? (pointing at the SSL console.)

Me: Just smiled and said yep.


Rap Session different day.

Rapper: We need to get the sound of a gun cocking in the song.

One of the entourage pulls out a gun and removes the clip and bullet from the chamber. And goes into the booth and we record it. That shit make me nervous,I'm trying to not do rap sessions anymore. I'm pretty sick of the BS that goes with dealing with thugs and how they have no concept of sound at all, But expect you to make them sound amaizing and talented.

-CD
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on April 16, 2007, 07:55:26 pm
kudos to all of you who have done rap sessions.  all your stories are freaking me out.  i couldn't do it.

i totally forgot about this one.....

"Can you take that SUCK out of my monitor?"

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: TheViking on April 18, 2007, 12:48:06 am
oh geez...   you just reminded me of another one like that...

bassist in recording room ready to track some background vocals looks at me through the glass and says...

"hey dude...   is this glass suck-proof?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: typek on April 18, 2007, 11:22:09 am
rollmottle wrote on Fri, 30 March 2007 11:33

Thomas Lester wrote on Fri, 30 March 2007 08:40

During a gangsta' rap session.

Me:  (walk into the control room while taking a break, returning to start vocals)

Me:  (Look through the control room window into the dimmly lit live room to see the rapper behind the U47 with a wide stance and a 9mm pistol in his right hand, with his arms crossed across his chest)

Me:  "Is that a real gun?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Is it loaded?"

Rapper:  "Yes..."

Me:  "Why are you holding a loaded gun?"

Rapper:  "I'm wrapping about killing people...  I want to feel like I have that power while I lay down the track.  It'll sound authentic."

Me:  "I'm not comfortable with this idea."

Rapper:  "I'm not rapping without the Gun."

Me:  (to the assistant), "get the studio manager to get their manager on the phone".

Me:  "Hold on a sec..."

We ended up agreeing to me keeping the clip and all the bullets.  He got to hold the gun.  Ironically...  the lyrics were about killing white guys.  I was the only white guy in the room....     Even with the bullets, I was feeling a bit uncomfortable...  I've got a picture of me with 9mm bullets lined up across the scribble strip of a VR72 somewhere.  I'll have to post it some time.

They were really great guys and the album turned out good and I did 2 more records with them over the following few years.  It was just that songs lyrics....


Laughing  crazy.



i recently have been workin with some gangster rap guys.. for some reason they feel the need to bring 5 too many people that want to stand there in the booth with them and shake around and such.. they are a bit intimidating but its a good learning experience.. they have gold teeth and shit..  this guy's favortite thing to say once he gets in the booth is "where's my snare", or "i need more snare in my headphones" mocking eminem's famous words..

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: audio~geek on April 22, 2007, 11:20:24 am
This thread is hilarious  Laughing

One of my teachers was telling us about a session, browsing the plugin list the artist notices the dither plugin: "Hey! The dither plugin, put that on the vocal!" So they did. "Yeah thats way better."

Also

We (the students) would be mocking Eminem "I need more dither in my headphones!"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: marcel on April 22, 2007, 01:58:47 pm
typek wrote on Wed, 18 April 2007 08:22

 this guy's favortite thing to say once he gets in the booth is "where's my snare", or "i need more snare in my headphones" mocking eminem's famous words..




Eminem was actually mocking Michael Jackson...  A few years ago there was a re-release of Thriller with some bonus material, demos and such.

The demo for (I believe) Billie Jean starts with MJ saying clearly "I need more kick in the phones...  more kick and snare in the phones".

Now we can tell MJ jokes for a while...  LOL

Best, Marcel
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: mattrussell on April 22, 2007, 08:50:50 pm
didn't happen in the studio, but did happen while multitack recording...

so, i get asked to make a live recording in a VERY noisy jazz club/restaurant.  had been there a few times to watch some friends and i'd say the noise floor hovered around 95dB in the place.  really f'n loud euro-money college hang in the boston area.  no one really listend to the GREAT playing that was going on there, they just like to be seen there.

on the phone, i say to the owner (who called me to do the job), "this should be fun.  the playing is spectacular and you have a loud place.  it will be sorta cool to capture the atmosphere of it all in the recording."  he says, "yeah, exactly--that's the idea."  he hires me to record 7 nights, all three sets per night and then pick the best material to mix to be put onto a very long CD.  he's not sure he'll even release it, but has money and likes to spend it and i bet he's love to play it for his friends.  

he finally shows up to see what i'm up to recording the thing on night 6, asks to listen to some of it.  i hand him the headphones and explain "it's not mixed, these are the raw tracks from the last set."  not sure he gets that but...

i kid you not, he says (with his absolutely bizarre long island accent meets joe pesci voice) "sounds great, you just gotta filter out the crowd noise."  

incidentally, the place closed about a year later and the CD was never finished.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: unclebubba on April 22, 2007, 11:20:44 pm
 Client:
That doesn't look like it will sound good.

Rap Client:
Does this board have animation ?
Engineer:
Yeah, and Bugs Bunny is gonna mix your record.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: CCC on April 23, 2007, 12:00:08 am
Producer: "watch me, I'll show you where to punch ... here it comes, wait for it ... and ... punch HERE! ... NO! WAIT PUNCH HERE INSTEAD!"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on April 23, 2007, 12:58:12 am
Assistant to rap hangers on: "Uh.... anybody know where *ARTIST* is?"

Rap hangers on : "I don't even give a fuck, we're just here to smoke weed and watch cable"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: audio~geek on April 23, 2007, 01:01:37 am
M Carter wrote on Sun, 22 April 2007 23:58

Assistant to rap hangers on: "Uh.... anybody know where *ARTIST* is?"

Rap hangers on : "I don't even give a fuck, we're just here to smoke weed and watch cable"


Laughing  At least he's honest
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: RSettee on April 23, 2007, 01:10:55 am
This thread is hilarious!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: studentcouncil on April 23, 2007, 12:06:14 pm
"I like my bass lines monogamous"
"Can I get that warm analog digicle sound?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: mattrussell on April 23, 2007, 04:05:48 pm
Engineer: I thought I asked you to go get me the Reddi D/I from session in studio B if they are not using it?

Intern: Oh, you didn't want me to trade the OH U67's for a U47?

Engineer:  No.  That's a mic and not one that I need right now.  What I needed was to keep my OH's where they were and also, I needed to get a D/I for the bass player.

Intern: Oh...

Engineer: Go home, now.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: audio~geek on April 24, 2007, 03:12:29 pm
Not in the studio but...
Back when I was in a band we used to like to trick our drummer.
One time I said" Danny, more reverb on the snare!"
And he tried.

He also liked to do practice count-ins, before actually counting in.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on April 24, 2007, 04:13:36 pm
client standing over my shoulder says:

"man, i can clearly see this is a great mix, look at all the colors you got on the screen......."
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Randall Squires on April 26, 2007, 04:57:42 am
In the middle of editing this one "MC's" vocals, he gets on his cell phone, calls up some guy and proceeds to have a conversation about a "fishing pole" that he left in the guys back yard, that he needed to pick it up, knew that it had no "bait" in it, and that he was going to put some in.....cuz he needed to use it. Can you say shotgun? Last time I ever let him near the studio.

Though on the other side, a realy famous Hip-Hop artist and his whole entourage were some of the best chess players that I had ever encountered...we also ended up talking philosophy. Goes to show I guess.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Fibes on April 26, 2007, 09:42:13 am
Young Indie Rockers start into a tune, I stop them and hit talkback:

Fibes-"The guitar is out of tune"

YIR-"I beg to differ"

Fibes-"Honestly I don't stop bands for no reason"

YIR-"It's perfect"

I walk to TR, pick up tuner and patch it in.

Fibes-"See, every string is sharp."

YIR-"My guitar is always sharp on tuners"

Fibes- <incredulous look on my face> "Maybe you should send it back."

Whew.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: mmazurek on April 26, 2007, 10:29:04 am
...end of a vocal take, singer asks...

  "How was that?"


Records a double with the original track playing.
At the end, he hears himself say "How was that?" and responds...

  "Sounded good, what do you think?"


Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: ScotcH on April 26, 2007, 04:00:36 pm
mmazurek wrote on Thu, 26 April 2007 10:29

...end of a vocal take, singer asks...

  "How was that?"


Records a double with the original track playing.
At the end, he hears himself say "How was that?" and responds...

  "Sounded good, what do you think?"





Oh man, that's gold .... did  you get the response on tape? Very Happy
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: MikeNice81 on April 29, 2007, 06:02:27 pm
Cult_Status02 wrote on Sat, 07 April 2007 01:56


Rappers (and I hate this term for some reason, not sure how you guys feel as I'm new here.): "Can you school and chop this?"




Shocked  Laughing I can't believe they said "school and chop." It is supposed to be "Screw and Chop." Since You are not DJ Screw and he is currently dead... there really is only one answer.

"Screwed" music sounds like garbage anyway. It reminds me of a cassette single with bleed through from the other side.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: MikeNice81 on April 29, 2007, 06:19:10 pm
I was in the studio while a friend recorded a rapper. I swear the rapper said...

Rapper: "Can you give me another voice?"
Eng: "What?"
Rapper: "You know when you make my voice keep going."
Eng: "You want echo?"
Rapper: "No I want to hear the word repeat a couple of times after I say something!"

I was working a live show with a band that was less than stellar. The guitar player was less than brilliant.

GP: "I can't hear the rest of the band."
Me: "I have everybody up in the monitors. Maybe you should turn down your amp a little."
GP: "No I need more monitor."
I turn up his monitor mix full blast
GP: "Still can't hear the band."
I get him to stop playing and I can hear his monitor all the way across the club.
Gp: "What did you do? I can hear the band now."


Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: audio~geek on April 30, 2007, 02:56:58 pm
A&R guy comes into the studio and the band plays what they've recorded.
"Its good but, is that clicking sound going to be in the mix?"
Referring to the click track.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: McAllister on May 02, 2007, 11:57:51 am
Dude 1: Yeah, man, we tune down to E flat.
Dude 2: Really?
Dude 1: Yeah, we've pretty much done everything you can do in A 440.

- - -

Guy who just bought his first bass: It's really cool but I wish I'd gotten a fretless.
Me: Why?
Guy: I don't wanna be restricted by notes.


These are pretty good, too.
From Bob Clearmountain's site:
http://www.bobclearmountain.com/bugsusframeset.html

M
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: ssltech on May 02, 2007, 05:38:25 pm
Reggae vocalist, requesting adjustment to his headphone mix:

"Mista apareeatah... can I have maar beass at all frequencies?"
_________

Also, 'artist', commenting on a mix balance early in the mixdown... (somehow I knew this was going to be a long day...):

"Can you make everything less bassy, then roll all the treble off everything as well... -then pull out the mids and make everything louder?"
_________

Old Scottish blues player, upon seeing young guitarist intently staring at his tuner during a tune-up. Grabbed the strings at the neck, to stop the youngster from continuing, then in a Scottish brogue, intoned:

"Ne-eer tune up laddie..."

[long pause...]

[and then -leaning closer- and in whispered tones, as if imparting some ancient, closely-guarded secret:]

"...-tis a sign o' weakness!!!"
_________

Guitarist... No.  Strike that.  Guitar owner, after first pass, replying to the comment "I think we should check the tuning.... -sounds like it might be a little off to me."

"No. -Can't be. -I had it tuned last week."
_________

Definition of a gentleman:

-A man who CAN play the trombone... -but doesn't.
_________

Keef
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on May 02, 2007, 07:07:16 pm
that had to be the funniest bunch of quotes yet Smile
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on May 10, 2007, 09:41:26 am
from last nights session with a high school prog-ish rock band doing guitar overs.
guitar guy is using a super reverb with some sort of boss "do-it-all" floorboard processor in front of it, set to a "5150" modeling preset. what the hell? needless to say it sounds awful.

guitar guy: "can you use like um a ah... noise reducer on this intro part... cause i uhh usually have lots of noise and stuff going on right before the intro... like when we play live"
(runs his left hand up and down the neck making squeeky crappy digtal zippery noises come out of the pedal board thing)
me: "i'm sorry - what exactly do you want?"
guitar guy: "yeah .... uh like... do you have a noise reducer you can use for this intro? so i can get like all this noise in there?"
(again, makes all sorts of unusable chirps and scratches come from the super reverb sitting in the other room"
me: "wait, are you saying you want all that noise on there?"
guitar guy: "yeah yeah"
me: "so you want a noise increaser."
guitar guy:"no no.... i usually have all this noise coming from my amp when we are playing live and i want it on there... do you have a noise reducer on this right now?"
me: (thinking this kid needs classes in basic english communication skills) "no - that's part of your preset on that floorboard you have. it's got a noise gate on it. evidently."
guitar guy: "yeah - ok - nevermind."
me: "great! lets get started then!" *turns toward console and rolls eyes*

-pete
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: don kerce on May 12, 2007, 12:21:51 pm
From a session yesterday.

Songwriter to steel guitar player-"Can you make that pedal steel guitar sound like a strummed banjo?"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: velvet on May 12, 2007, 02:08:04 pm
From the rehersal for a "live" concert of bunch of "Pop Idol" finalists in european country in a concert hall:

The song is beying played back from a CD (one of those "live concerts... Rolling Eyes ) , a sound engeneer is operating it.

Everybody in the hall hears someone is out of tune. Even the "Talent" registers something is not OK.

>Talent (after the song ends) to the micophone , (as a coach to his student):
"...Hey yo soundman, you have to repair somethin' with your CD player!"

>Sound Engeneer: "...????  Nothing's wrong with it."

>Talent: "No man, it is playing out of tune."

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Hank Alrich on May 14, 2007, 03:02:18 pm
don kerce wrote on Sat, 12 May 2007 09:21

From a session yesterday.

Songwriter to steel guitar player-"Can you make that pedal steel guitar sound like a strummed banjo?"


If he'd asked Jimmy Day to do that it might actually have happened. <g>
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Steve Hudson on May 14, 2007, 04:54:34 pm
M Carter wrote on Sun, 22 April 2007 23:58

Assistant to rap hangers on: "Uh.... anybody know where *ARTIST* is?"

Rap hangers on : "I don't even give a fuck, we're just here to smoke weed and watch cable"


A studio owner I know told me he got a call from a prospective client who asked how big his sofa was. Must have been a big posse.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on May 15, 2007, 01:26:59 am
drummer: can you turn the click up?
engineer: the click is up.  
drummer: can you turn it up more?
engineer: all the way.
drummer:  but can you turn
engineer: are you wearing earplugs?
drummer: actually... yes.
engineer: take out your fucking earplugs!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: yanik on May 15, 2007, 12:33:44 pm
After months of re-doing parts and adding new ones, mixing and remixing, client says "I've finally figured out what I don't like about it. It's too slow."
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rocken on May 15, 2007, 05:54:39 pm


Rehearsal last week:


Guitarist: "Has this amp been fixed?"

Me: "Yes it has"

Guitarist:"I think there is still something wrong with it"

Me:"Why?"

Guitarist:"The sound is bursting out even though I've turned off the volume on my guitar"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on May 15, 2007, 06:49:39 pm
this isn't a quote, but it's still really funny.

A MUSICIAN WRITES TO DEAR ABBY

Dear Abby...

I believe my wife is cheating on me.

I am a working musician and I travel a lot. I have
been noticing strange things happening when I get home. Her mobile phone rings
and she steps outside to answer it or she says, "I'll call you
back later".

When I ask her who called she gets evasive. Sometimes she goes out with friends but comes
home late, getting dropped off around the corner and walking the rest of the way.

A buddy of mine plays guitar in a band. He called and told me that my wife and some guy have been to
his gigs. He also wanted to know if he could borrow my guitar amp.

That's when I got the idea to find out for myself what was really happening.

I said "Sure, you can use my amp but I want to hide behind it at the gig and see if she comes into the
venue with this guy". He agreed.

Saturday night came and I slipped behind my Marshall JCM800 half stack to get a good view. I could
feel the heat coming off the back of the amp. It was at that moment, crouching down behind the amp,
that I noticed that one of the tubes was not glowing as bright as the other 3.  

Is this something I can fix myself or do need to take it to a technician?

Signed,

Concerned


Smile Smile Smile
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: dcgzr on May 19, 2007, 06:15:23 am
more hi end!!
or make my bass (Fender jazz with flatwounds) more defined in the mix. Try 16-18K

Another wiz kid asked me to gate the snare out of the overheads
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Taproot on May 25, 2007, 01:11:49 am
After a request for quick tuneup on the guitar, the reply was, "Tuning is the Hobgoblin of small minds."- A. Chilton

Fu**ing love it!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Taproot on May 25, 2007, 01:32:52 am
True story: Starting out as  a phone guy. Dude calls and asks, "How much do it cost to make record?"

I say, "$90 per hour."

Dude says (quote), "I got 3 songs at about three minutes each, so put me down for 10 minutes. Just to be safe."

Nearly shite myself.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on May 25, 2007, 07:03:00 pm
Quote:

True story: Starting out as a phone guy. Dude calls and asks, "How much do it cost to make record?"

I say, "$90 per hour."

Dude says (quote), "I got 3 songs at about three minutes each, so put me down for 10 minutes. Just to be safe."

Nearly shite myself.




HAHAHAHA
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Han S. on June 21, 2007, 12:06:56 pm
Tracking an old style jazzband, the clarinetplayer turns away from the microphone and is facing the trumpetplayer on his left side.

I go to the TR and ask him: can you do me a favor? Please play closer to the mic and in it's direction, okay?

He: no, I don't wanna be too loud.

Mixing time, clarinet player: can you make the clarinet a little louder?

Duh!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: duckhunter on June 22, 2007, 01:00:48 pm
Vocalist to me: Can you make me a Karaoke copy of that mix, because I know if I take it home and practice I'll sound better tomorrow?



Guitar player to me: Stop recording.  My guitar is out of tune......ok, now I'm ready so hit record.  Stop, I'm still out of tune.....ok, now I'm ready again...hit record.  Wait, stop, I'm still out of tune.

Me: Son, is your guitar intonated?

Guitar Player:  What's that mean?



Vocalist to me:  Can you put that thing on my vocals that makes me sing perfectly, but I don't want anybody to know.

Vocalist to me after applying Autotune:  But everybody's gonna to know.



Me to artist: Michael (real name), you have to chart your stuff out before you get to the studio so the session players and your recording session can be more productive.

Artist to me:  I don't have time. They're professionals and they should be able to follow along.

Next day after 4 hour session turned to 6:  How much did you say I was paying for those session players?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Mike Major on June 23, 2007, 12:08:18 am
I have to preface this. This bass player was very smart and knew exactly what he was doing.

I was talking to the singer on the talkback mic and the bass palyer was leaning over the console listening to the monitors very closely. He asks me "Do these work?" referring to the monitors. I say " of course".

He looks directly at the monitors and says:

"Watson, come quickly I need you".

I was laughing uncontrollably for quite awhile. Brilliant!!


Mike
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Andy Peters on June 23, 2007, 04:27:53 am
Taproot wrote on Thu, 24 May 2007 22:11

After a request for quick tuneup on the guitar, the reply was, "Tuning is the Hobgoblin of small minds."- A. Chilton


Alex once requested that I make sure the monitor wedge EQs were "flat above 1k."

He then put on the best show anyone had ever seen him do, ever.

-a
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Greg Dixon on June 24, 2007, 08:06:09 am
Years ago I was setting up a jazz band to record and realized the guitarist was tuning to the bassplayer. I asked him if he wanted to borrow a tuner. He said yes. A while latter he was tuning to the bass again and asked if there was a problem. He said the tuner didn't work. I said "Really? It was fine yesterday. Show me what's happening." He plugged in and I noticed the volume on his guitar was down. I pointed that out and he said that shouldn't matter. He's never needed to have it on for other tuners to work.......
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: takeout on June 25, 2007, 02:27:44 pm
ssltech wrote on Wed, 02 May 2007 22:38

...Guitar owner...

One of my favorite turns of phrase.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Daniel Farris on June 25, 2007, 09:11:57 pm
"Does your studio have M-One D-One?"

How long would it take you to figure out that they meant MIDI?

Another favorite. A friend of mine used to work in a music store, and a woman came in looking for a wireless mic. She looked at several models and, when she had found one she liked the look of, well... imagine a woman standing there holding a wireless mic. She turned it over and looked at the bottom and said, "Where the sound come out?"

DF
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: stuntbutt on June 26, 2007, 12:58:49 am
Hardcore band in my control room looking at the pictures I have tacked to the wall:  "Hey man, don't get mad but we were wondering if we could see a NAKED picture of your wife?"  I've got a few stories from that session.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Greg Dixon on June 26, 2007, 02:04:22 am
I had a guy ring up one time saying he wanted to book two hours of studio time. I asked what he wanted to do, assuming it would be a vocal and guitar/piano demo of one or two songs and he said wanted to record a band. I asked what he expected to get done in two hours and he said ten songs. I told him we'd need longer than that and he asked why, as it was a 10 song 40 minute set, so two hours was enough time to play each song twice, with some extra time. When I told him the reality of the situation, he was convinced I was ripping him off and hung up.

Early on in my career, I had an indie band do a very rough album, very quickly. Inside the booklet they say it was recorded in 24 hrs. A few years latter a girl rang asking to book a 24 hr block to record an album. I said I didn't do that and she mentioned that CD and I said, yes but it wasn't 24 hrs in a row. She replied, "but it says recorded in 24 hrs, at Aphek Studio". I then added that in reality I don't think they ever did more than 4 hrs at a time and her reaction was a very sad "oh.... ok then", as she hung up.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Jon Hodgson on June 30, 2007, 05:03:24 am
Greg Dixon wrote on Tue, 26 June 2007 07:04

I had a guy ring up one time saying he wanted to book two hours of studio time. I asked what he wanted to do, assuming it would be a vocal and guitar/piano demo of one or two songs and he said wanted to record a band. I asked what he expected to get done in two hours and he said ten songs. I told him we'd need longer than that and he asked why, as it was a 10 song 40 minute set, so two hours was enough time to play each song twice, with some extra time. When I told him the reality of the situation, he was convinced I was ripping him off and hung up.

Early on in my career, I had an indie band do a very rough album, very quickly. Inside the booklet they say it was recorded in 24 hrs. A few years latter a girl rang asking to book a 24 hr block to record an album. I said I didn't do that and she mentioned that CD and I said, yes but it wasn't 24 hrs in a row. She replied, "but it says recorded in 24 hrs, at Aphek Studio". I then added that in reality I don't think they ever did more than 4 hrs at a time and her reaction was a very sad "oh.... ok then", as she hung up.


When The Animals went into the studio to record "House of the Rising Sun" they had an hour booked, the thing was that they did it in one take, so it only took 20 minutes including setting up.

So what do you do when you have 40 minutes of studio time you've already paid for? Well that's simple, you record an EP!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: archtop on June 30, 2007, 08:31:55 pm
I had a bass player with a huge rack, and besides all the goofy chorus, compressors,
and who knows what else, he had a huge canyon 2-3 second reverb as part of his sound, I asked if he could shorten it or make it dryer or something.


He say's.  No thats a gate.

I explained to him what a gate was.


He wouldn't believe me.

"it's a gate"

We argued for a while.
I even used my favorite line I stole from my brother.



"Do you know who I am?"




He probably still to this day is calling his 3 second reverb a gate.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Ali Moniack on July 02, 2007, 11:17:29 pm
Inexperienced indie drummer, prior to recording:

"Can you give it a bit of "edge"?

Me: "Edge? Are you thinking about eq or distortion or something?"

Drummer: "Dunno, just thought a bit of "edge" would be good"

Me: "No problem".

They were very pleased with the results, since their playing was so rough it had a certain "edge" all by itself anyway...


Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: J-Texas on July 24, 2007, 10:40:23 pm
Not a quote, but very bizarre!

Had a lady from an AD agency in town bring her little yippy dog to the studio! The thing had a little bell on her collar and she let her run loose in the tracking room during a voiceover. I thought they were warming up and she asked if "I got it?" When I told her I couldn't keep it and she would have to get "Sparky" out of there, she looked at me funny and made her producer (flunky) watch the dog while she ran crazy in the control room! WOW. No clue.

Money is the root of evil.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on September 06, 2007, 08:55:59 am
last night's mixing session with singer/songwriter:
i'm mixing and  adding elements to tracks he did himself at home (vox/acoustic guit/synthy stuff) adding simple percussion, bass, etc, you get the picture.

me (noticing mad tempo shifts): "did you play this to a click?"
client: "yup"
me (pointing out 2 areas of the song that shift by about 10 bpm): "these are totally different tempo's here.... ?"
client: "oh.... i may not have actualy listened to the click when i was recording though".

right on.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on September 06, 2007, 10:47:59 pm
pete andrews wrote on Thu, 06 September 2007 07:55

last night's mixing session with singer/songwriter:
i'm mixing and  adding elements to tracks he did himself at home (vox/acoustic guit/synthy stuff) adding simple percussion, bass, etc, you get the picture.

me (noticing mad tempo shifts): "did you play this to a click?"
client: "yup"
me (pointing out 2 areas of the song that shift by about 10 bpm): "these are totally different tempo's here.... ?"
client: "oh.... i may not have actualy listened to the click when i was recording though".

right on.



i think that has to top my current list of genius "home studio" moves.

BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: jonathan jetter on September 14, 2007, 03:46:24 am
a couple years back i was recording + mixing a hard rock EP for a friend of a friend.  the drums + bass had been tracked by a friend of mine who ended up not being able to do the project.  the bassist...well...lets just say he wasn't afraid to play a lot of notes.

for some reason he convinces my client that he needs to be there for the mixing session.  because he has pro tools at home too and he even has some fancy EQ called "renaissance."  

i load up the rough mix.  we get to work.  client's digging it.  bassist chimes in:

"i think we need to turn down the kick drum."

me:  "ok.  hey (client), do you agree w/ that?"  
him:  "yeah let's try it."

i turn down the kick, start EQ'ing some other stuff.  etc etc.

bassist:  "ok now that we turned down the kick...im hearing too much guitar.  can we turn down the guitar?"

i turn down the guitar.  get back to doing real work.  another 10 or 15 minutes go by.

"ok now that we've turned down the kick and the rhythm guitar, i think we need to turn down the lead vocal."

and then

"now i think the harmonies are too loud.  lets turn those down too."

"you know...it's weird.  now even the keys are too loud."

"the kick is too loud again."

at this point we'd been working for a little over 2 hours.  i pulled my client aside and told him that he'd just paid for 2 hours of time for me to essentially turn up the bass by 3db.

the bassist also has probably my favorite studio quote ever.  he decided he didn't like the vocal sound so.....

"can you gate the vocal more?  i think you need more gate on the vocal."

...

...

...i give up.

jon
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: el duderino on September 27, 2007, 11:11:18 am
this past weekend i did a quick ep for a punk band. sunday i'm mixing a song and have them come in and listen to it and tell me what they think. simple enough.

the guitar player and the drummer start talking about it.

Drummer: do you think the drums should come up more in the bridge?

Guitarist: oh dont ask me, i dont know how to listen to drums.


WTF? Rolling Eyes
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: disincorporated on September 27, 2007, 11:44:51 pm
About 5 or 6 years ago I played in this noise/metal band for about six months....the singer/guitar player had the proverbial rich uncle, and they had all this gear laying around that they didn't have a clue how to use.

They were also very anti-theory, mostly cause they were too busy smoking weed and watching TV to bother learning about chords, or anything else....one day I'm in one room with headphones attached to one of these trying to come up with presets, and I can sorta hear the front guy and the bassist in the next room trying to track (on one of these).

They're playing the same thing over and over and not getting it. We'd played it a zillion times just fine with all four of us in one room, but now that they were trying to track it, they couldn't. This goes on for a while, maybe 30 minutes or more, and finally I can't stand it any longer and I take off the phones and start paying attention. After about 10 seconds of listening, I realize that they're trying to record a 6/8 tune to a 4/4 click (which is obviously the default setting).

!!!!

So I go in and tell them to try changing the click to 6/8. Of course they didn't want to hear it. "Fuck off with your technical bullshit," they tell me. Sheer rock greatness will carry us through, as long as we never learn anything at all....

After about 10 more minutes of frustration, I finally convince them to at least try it, so they can say definitively that I was full of shit....and about five minutes later they had the thing laid down and had moved on, and I got back to noodling with the synth.

Of course they had to be all tough guy and pretend it didn't happen....
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: MikeNice81 on October 05, 2007, 02:02:16 pm
Just this morning...

Rapper: Can I get you to make me sound like Ludacris?
Me: What exactly do you mean?
Rapper: I want my voice and flow to sound exactly like Ludacris.
(The rapper's voice sounds like Barry White with a three pack a day smoking habit.)
Me: I can change the pitch and edit the timing some. I don't think it'll sound exactly the same. Your voice is just too deep and rough.
Rapper: Then how does Ludacris do it?

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on October 10, 2007, 11:12:30 pm
I was talking to a kid on myspace.....read from the bottom up....I almost
fell out of my chair!!!  Sorry this had nothing to do with engineering, but it was funny Smile.


----------
i have no clue of what your talking about
melody meter,vive, freehand prose?

tropical idea?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on October 11, 2007, 12:08:19 am
I hate to call you out (or maybe I don't).. but to air someone out like that  in a not so subtle/anonymous way... It's just a bit mean .

It's one thing to go 'Oh, listen to what some d-bag said on a session... who thinks he knows what he's talking about', but it's an entirely different thing when someone comes to you for advice or help because they don't know what they're talking about.  Then I think you're more obligated to either help them or send them on their way.  Making fun of them?  That's just wrong, man.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: rob s on October 13, 2007, 01:57:26 am
from back in the day on a go go session,

"you sound more like you do now then you did just a little while ago"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on October 14, 2007, 01:34:06 pm
Quote:

I hate to call you out (or maybe I don't).. but to air someone out like that in a not so subtle/anonymous way... It's just a bit mean .

It's one thing to go 'Oh, listen to what some d-bag said on a session... who thinks he knows what he's talking about', but it's an entirely different thing when someone comes to you for advice or help because they don't know what they're talking about. Then I think you're more obligated to either help them or send them on their way. Making fun of them? That's just wrong, man.


it's like the old saying goes

"he's not here, so we can make fun of him"

i dare you to go find this person and tell him.  he would not even care.  i know this guy, and you don't.  

who says i used the guy's real name?  and even if i did, there are probably millions of Richard's in this world, so I'm pretty sure his anonymity would still be plenty protected.

i'd say i won't let it happen again, but i can't be sure how anyone will react to anything that i post on here.  this seems to be a place where anything that anyone posts is open for immediate and aggressive attack.

it really seems to me that attacks are coming from people who are just having a bad day.

i assume now that there will be some retorts from various individuals who deem it necessary to chime in UNnecessarily, so let me be clear.  you won't hear from me again on this.  i'm sorry, and "it won't happen again".

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Kuntar on October 15, 2007, 02:12:43 am
Phone conversation with a rapper:

Me: Hello?

Rapper: "Yo checkit, I don't know nuthin bout the game, I don't know nuthin bout music, I don't know nuthin bout cars. I can change a tire on a car. I can check the oil in a car. Yo, you got 3 minutes? Listen to me rap!(proceeds to rap for 3 mins)Yo, you white?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on October 16, 2007, 05:53:48 pm
Kuntar wrote on Mon, 15 October 2007 01:12

Phone conversation with a rapper:

Me: Hello?

Rapper: "Yo checkit, I don't know nuthin bout the game, I don't know nuthin bout music, I don't know nuthin bout cars. I can change a tire on a car. I can check the oil in a car. Yo, you got 3 minutes? Listen to me rap!(proceeds to rap for 3 mins)Yo, you white?


SNAP!!!!!

i got a message on my answering machine years ago.

"YO this is big daddy cane, just shoutin out to feel what your company is throwin down.  you can call me anytime, i'll be up................................YOU HEARD ME!"

the really long pause and wrapping up with "you heard me"  left me fighting for a breathe of air.

anyway......

how does ludacris do it?????????!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHAHA

brilliant.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on October 17, 2007, 12:11:50 am
It's actually Big Daddy Kane.... with a K.

Matt
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on October 17, 2007, 10:24:07 am
my bad, dawg.................YOU HEARD ME!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on October 17, 2007, 11:19:34 am
Recent Quote from a Rapper to our night manager -

We'll call the rapper MC Pez Dispenser for discussion sake.

NM - Uhm,  I'm sorry MC Pez Dispenser, but your girl can't go down into the session, she's not on the list of people allowed in the session.

MC Pez - Yo son, don't you know who I am??  You better GOOGLE me, son!  I'm SPECIAL!




Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: ichbin on October 19, 2007, 09:25:42 pm
Singer of indie band during mix.
"It's just missing something, I'm not sure what though. It just all needs to be um....louder"
I turned it up, the rest of the band laugh.

Drummer of jazz band during tracking.
"Can I get some more bass in the headphones?"
Before I can even reach for the knob.
"That's much better thanks".
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: compasspnt on October 20, 2007, 07:53:43 am
http://www.google.bs/search?hl=en&q=mc+pez+dispenser& ;btnG=Google+Search
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: M Carter on October 20, 2007, 03:11:39 pm
Engineer after hearing our ridonkulously marked up media prices -

"Damn.  That is HOT.   That is BALLS!"


Some thugs outside our door on 48th st. heard through our intercom-

"Yeah son... the cops can't FADE me, son.  For real.  I'm sorry, but I am too gully for my own bitch"
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: makinao on October 20, 2007, 07:48:51 pm
j.hall wrote on Mon, 02 April 2007 21:31

WHOA!!!!!!!!!

i've seen a lot of crazy things in the studio, but a loaded gun is not one of them.




What's even crazier is that I've been in a session wherein the guy holding gun was the engineer!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: compasspnt on October 20, 2007, 10:27:40 pm
makinao wrote on Sat, 20 October 2007 19:48

j.hall wrote on Mon, 02 April 2007 21:31

WHOA!!!!!!!!!

i've seen a lot of crazy things in the studio, but a loaded gun is not one of them.




What's even crazier is that I've been in a session wherein the guy holding gun was the engineer!



Been in a couple where I probably needed one.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Ryan Slowey on October 22, 2007, 10:07:23 am
Ichbin wrote on Fri, 19 October 2007 21:25



Drummer of jazz band during tracking.
"Can I get some more bass in the headphones?"
Before I can even reach for the knob.
"That's much better thanks".


Laughing

This cracks me up. i do FOH at a small club, and that happens all the time with the monitor mix. sometimes for fun, i'll just reach out and pretend i'm turning the vocal or instrument up, and 8 out of 10 times they say "that's cool".


Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on October 22, 2007, 12:46:42 pm
compasspnt wrote on Sat, 20 October 2007 21:27

makinao wrote on Sat, 20 October 2007 19:48

j.hall wrote on Mon, 02 April 2007 21:31

WHOA!!!!!!!!!

i've seen a lot of crazy things in the studio, but a loaded gun is not one of them.




What's even crazier is that I've been in a session wherein the guy holding gun was the engineer!



Been in a couple where I probably needed one.



i hope to never type that.  especially considering my studio is in my home where two small children and my wife live.....
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on November 10, 2007, 10:03:07 am
Quote:

i hope to never type that. especially considering my studio is in my home where two small children and my wife live.....


ditto.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on November 12, 2007, 01:46:43 pm
to date, i've never had to ask anyone to leave, i've not had to ask my family to clear out, nor have we felt the least bit uncomfortable.  i fully intend to keep it that way, with in my power.

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on November 15, 2007, 07:54:45 pm
(must have totally blocked this out of my mind)
but i remember years ago doing a session here with a hardcore band and the whole gang in in the main room screaming "F--- YOU!!!!" over and over in a rideout or something. good thing the kids weren't talkin' yet! (and asleep).

-pete
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: compasspnt on November 16, 2007, 06:04:14 pm
Was that the "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing" session, by any chance?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on December 06, 2007, 10:39:57 am
most definately not Wink
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Bill Cuomo on January 04, 2008, 09:23:49 am
Very stoned guitar player being told he has way too much delay effect through amp--"Well, like can you record me like this and remove the delay later?"

Famous arranger/composer pianist in piano booth being told that his poor timing is preventing the band from locking down a great performance--"Yeah, but I'm in a separate room". ENGINEER-"But, you're in the phone mix and everyone can hear you." PIANIST-"Yeah, but I'm in a separate room."



Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Former Oceanway drone on January 06, 2008, 04:09:48 pm
Inspired by Terry Manning's comment about perhaps needing a gun in a session, I offer up the following for your approval and amusement:

Long ago, in a land far, far away, I was working on a session with a metal band. The band was being financed by a friend of theirs who had lost a leg in a vehicular mishap. Everyone knew this except for my colleague. One afternoon as the session is rolling along nicely, the band's sponsor is wrapping the grip on a rather large hunting knife while my colleague is sitting behind the desk making small talk with him. Suddenly, the sponsor says, "Hey Randy, check this out," and stabs himself hard in the thigh of the prosthetic leg. As the knife oscillated back and forth, he laughed and laughed. My colleague almost had a heart attack.

Cheers,

Alan Tomlinson
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: RSettee on January 07, 2008, 10:55:46 am
Former Oceanway drone wrote on Sun, 06 January 2008 15:09

Inspired by Terry Manning's comment about perhaps needing a gun in a session, I offer up the following for your approval and amusement:

Long ago, in a land far, far away, I was working on a session with a metal band. The band was being financed by a friend of theirs who had lost a leg in a vehicular mishap. Everyone knew this except for my colleague. One afternoon as the session is rolling along nicely, the band's sponsor is wrapping the grip on a rather large hunting knife while my colleague is sitting behind the desk making small talk with him. Suddenly, the sponsor says, "Hey Randy, check this out," and stabs himself hard in the thigh of the prosthetic leg. As the knife oscillated back and forth, he laughed and laughed. My colleague almost had a heart attack.

Cheers,

Alan Tomlinson


That's hilarious!
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Fig on January 08, 2008, 04:00:07 pm
Sorry to be so late to this thread but...

just last weekend, four-piece rock band comes in

usually our house kit is used as it is perfectly tuned to sound HUGE in the room, its already mic'ed up, positioned for the room mics, etc.

drummer insists on using his own kit

we tear ours down, he sets up his.  An hour goes by.

we begin tracking when drummer is finally ready

band comes in for first playback

"drums sound bad" says the band leader

I insist I am only reproducing what is being given

we walk into the tracking room

drummer plays for bandmembers

"ya gotta make the drums sound better," they say

"yeah," agrees the drummer, "cuz my kit sounds like $hit!"

...great...

[edit=changed a "t" to an "s" for spelling and consequent meaning]
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on January 09, 2008, 05:45:32 pm
upon my arrival to a pre-production session out of town.

band i've only communicated with via phone and email

drummer says:

"i'm so glad you are not 50....."

i just laughed and shook some hands.....
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Shalebot on January 11, 2008, 05:23:40 am
Ichbin wrote on Fri, 19 October 2007 20:25


Drummer of jazz band during tracking.
"Can I get some more bass in the headphones?"
Before I can even reach for the knob.
"That's much better thanks".


I used to do live sound for a band (FOH and monitors for most gigs) and this would happen all the time with their in-ears. I wouldn't do anything, and they'd give me the "okay" signal. =P
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Chris Ilett on January 11, 2008, 07:03:25 am
Version wrote on Tue, 27 March 2007 14:44

"When I look at the drum kit, I just see a series of mistakes about to be made."

drummer to me.
I just didn't say anything.


Laughing
I used to see the same thing with  every band who walked into a *nameless* venue I used to work.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Chris Ilett on January 11, 2008, 07:05:51 am
j.hall wrote on Thu, 29 March 2007 17:41

band to me, "great mix, we just need to change a few tiny things here and there"

me to the band, "feel free to ruin the song........"



Awesome thread. I'm gonna use me that one
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: MagnetoSound on January 11, 2008, 01:09:18 pm

Rapper, looking at mic, to engineer,  'Is that mic good? Is it CD quality?'

Engineer:  'It's got .... a. quality.'

Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on January 11, 2008, 03:37:41 pm
Chris Ilett wrote on Fri, 11 January 2008 06:05

j.hall wrote on Thu, 29 March 2007 17:41

band to me, "great mix, we just need to change a few tiny things here and there"

me to the band, "feel free to ruin the song........"



Awesome thread. I'm gonna use me that one



the key is to use the word "song" and NOT "mix"

it's so arrogant to imply your mix actually makes the song......i love doing that during recalls.  usually keeps people laughing.  
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Chris Ilett on January 12, 2008, 08:17:36 am
Even though your mix makes the song.  Cool
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: j.hall on January 12, 2008, 02:03:22 pm
Chris Ilett wrote on Sat, 12 January 2008 07:17

Even though your mix makes the song.  Cool


well, in my case, yes it  does........................................................ ............

HA
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: R. Koehler on January 22, 2008, 05:25:01 am
Not necessarily a "session" quote - but a mix quote...

So, I'm on aim with resident forumer D. Combs talking about a mix that he's rendering out in Sony Vegas.  He's having problems with the render (I forget what exactly) so I tell him to check his plugins to see if they're causing errors.

A few minutes later and the infamous words are uttered:

D. Combs: "Ah, I found the problem."
Me: "Yeah?  What's going on?"
D. Combs: "It was one of the compressors I was using."
Me: "What was it doing?"
D. Combs: "Compressing."

Confused Not the answer I was looking for, but oh well...
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: T. Mueller on February 07, 2008, 02:15:26 pm
j.hall wrote on Sat, 12 January 2008 13:03

Chris Ilett wrote on Sat, 12 January 2008 07:17

Even though your mix makes the song.  Cool


well, in my case, yes it   does........................................................ ............

HA



I concur.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 18, 2008, 05:26:59 pm
When speaking to another engineer about a particular piece of gear, I asked:

Me: 'Does it have Toslink out'?
Engineer: 'No, only 8 channel digital optical'


O...K...
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on February 20, 2008, 06:58:45 pm
grant richard wrote on Mon, 18 February 2008 16:26

When speaking to another engineer about a particular piece of gear, I asked:

Me: 'Does it have Toslink out'?
Engineer: 'No, only 8 channel digital optical'


O...K...


...Which is actually ADAT Optical...and not TOSLink, which is S/PDIF Optical.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 20, 2008, 10:20:30 pm
you're proving my point for me.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on February 21, 2008, 01:32:02 pm
I'm just saying that dude was right...it didn't have TOSLink.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TOSLINK

Now if by my understanding the difference between TOSLink and ADAT optical is making your point...then I guess I'll just shut it right now! Very Happy
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 21, 2008, 02:50:19 pm
"TOSLINK is a standardized optical fiber connection system. Its most common use is in consumer audio equipment (via a "digital optical" socket)."

Did you read the first sentence?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on February 21, 2008, 03:28:47 pm
Did you read the rest of it where it differentiated TOSLink from ADAT Optical?

Quote:

Occasionally, one may encounter terms for technology similar to TOSLINK, such as ADAT Lightpipe or simply ADAT Optical. This is most often seen in the professional music/audio industry. While the ADAT Lightpipe format utilizes the same JIS F05 connectors as TOSLINK, it should be noted that the ADAT Lightpipe format is NOT compatible with S/PDIF.


...same connector...different digital format.

Like saying that AES is the same thing as Balanced Analog on an XLR because the connectors are the same.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 21, 2008, 03:39:00 pm
you continue to prove my point.

me and the fellow engineer were talking about the same connector.

as you and i are talking about the same connector.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on February 21, 2008, 04:03:17 pm
It's not a "TOSLink" connector.  It's an optical connector.  That's used for multiple formats.

Methinks the engineer knew enough to know the difference.

Perhaps the pot should take a look at its color before it berates the kettle.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 21, 2008, 04:25:24 pm
duly noted.

so when I purchased my cable labeled "TOSlink" for my "ADAT optical" or "Digital optical" or "Digital lightpipe" or "whatever you want to call it" device....I purchased the wrong cable?

and if so, why does it work so well?
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: iCombs on February 21, 2008, 04:50:18 pm
NO...but on my MOTU 828, why does is differentiate between TOSLink and ADAT on its optical output?

I know you think I'm splitting hairs, but it's an important distinction.  

You definitely aren't gonna get 8 channels of audio into the TOSLink optical ins on a G5.  Same cable.

This is one of those things where specificity counts for something...and where assumption can get people into trouble.  It's not a semantic thing if there really IS a difference.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: eljaron on February 26, 2008, 04:30:26 pm
This cable discussion isn't funny at all.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: grantis on February 26, 2008, 06:14:09 pm
Quote:

This cable discussion isn't funny at all.


sorry to disappoint you
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: meverylame on February 27, 2008, 08:50:25 am
grant richard wrote on Thu, 21 February 2008 16:25

duly noted.

so when I purchased my cable labeled "TOSlink" for my "ADAT optical" or "Digital optical" or "Digital lightpipe" or "whatever you want to call it" device....I purchased the wrong cable?

and if so, why does it work so well?

Jesus.... Please tell me you went to audio school.....

RCA and SPDIF have the similar cable types. As a matter of fact you can use them almost interchangably. RIGHT??? But if you send SPDIF signal down an rca line and try to monitor it? Not great.

Dude, its not the cable or the connector its the way that the cable and connector are interfacing with the electronics.

SPDIF is a stereo format. Will ONLY work stereo.

ADAT lightpipe while using the same connector works only in 8 channel operation. So while yes you are right its the same cable you cannot (as far as I know) interface SPDIF optical gear with ADAT lightpipe gear using those connections.
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: Jesse Allain on March 11, 2008, 08:40:12 am
"Well... lets just use a 57"

Laughing
Title: Re: session quotes
Post by: pete andrews on March 11, 2008, 11:40:48 pm
and why's that funny?