R/E/P Community

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-  (Read 2529 times)

RMoore

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4584
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2010, 05:04:21 pm »

This guy is lucky to get away when he did!!

especially before kids and / or marriage.

Guys - stay away from women like this, alluring and perhaps 'interesting' at first with all the drama and intensity - they will sap your energy, drive you to distraction with the stress, ruin your life & move on to the next 'victim'.  


It all sounds very much like:


Borderline Personality Disorder

A brief overview that focuses on the symptoms, treatments, and research findings. (2001).


Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a serious mental illness characterized by pervasive instability in moods, interpersonal relationships, self-image, and behavior. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity. Originally thought to be at the "borderline" of psychosis, people with BPD suffer from a disorder of emotion regulation. While less well known than schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), BPD is more common, affecting 2 percent of adults, mostly young women.1 There is a high rate of self-injury without suicide intent, as well as a significant rate of suicide attempts and completed suicide in severe cases.2,3 Patients often need extensive mental health services, and account for 20 percent of psychiatric hospitalizations.4 Yet, with help, many improve over time and are eventually able to lead productive lives.

Symptoms

While a person with depression or bipolar disorder typically endures the same mood for weeks, a person with BPD may experience intense bouts of anger, depression, and anxiety that may last only hours, or at most a day.5 These may be associated with episodes of impulsive aggression, self-injury, and drug or alcohol abuse. Distortions in cognition and sense of self can lead to frequent changes in long-term goals, career plans, jobs, friendships, gender identity, and values. Sometimes people with BPD view themselves as fundamentally bad, or unworthy. They may feel unfairly misunderstood or mistreated, bored, empty, and have little idea who they are. Such symptoms are most acute when people with BPD feel isolated and lacking in social support, and may result in frantic efforts to avoid being alone.

People with BPD often have highly unstable patterns of social relationships. While they can develop intense but stormy attachments, their attitudes towards family, friends, and loved ones may suddenly shift from idealization (great admiration and love) to devaluation (intense anger and dislike). Thus, they may form an immediate attachment and idealize the other person, but when a slight separation or conflict occurs, they switch unexpectedly to the other extreme and angrily accuse the other person of not caring for them at all. Even with family members, individuals with BPD are highly sensitive to rejection, reacting with anger and distress to such mild separations as a vacation, a business trip, or a sudden change in plans. These fears of abandonment seem to be related to difficulties feeling emotionally connected to important persons when they are physically absent, leaving the individual with BPD feeling lost and perhaps worthless. Suicide threats and attempts may occur along with anger at perceived abandonment and disappointments.


People with BPD exhibit other impulsive behaviors, such as excessive spending, binge eating and risky sex. BPD often occurs together with other psychiatric problems, particularly bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety disorders, substance abuse, and other personality disorders.
Treatment

Treatments for BPD have improved in recent years. Group and individual psychotherapy are at least partially effective for many patients. Within the past 15 years, a new psychosocial treatment termed dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) was developed specifically to treat BPD, and this technique has looked promising in treatment studies.6 Pharmacological treatments are often prescribed based on specific target symptoms shown by the individual patient. Antidepressant drugs and mood stabilizers may be helpful for depressed and/or labile mood. Antipsychotic drugs may also be used when there are distortions in thinking.7
Recent Research Findings

Although the cause of BPD is unknown, both environmental and genetic factors are thought to play a role in predisposing patients to BPD symptoms and traits. Studies show that many, but not all individuals with BPD report a history of abuse, neglect, or separation as young children.8 Forty to 71 percent of BPD patients report having been sexually abused, usually by a non-caregiver.9 Researchers believe that BPD results from a combination of individual vulnerability to environmental stress, neglect or abuse as young children, and a series of events that trigger the onset of the disorder as young adults. Adults with BPD are also considerably more likely to be the victim of violence, including rape and other crimes. This may result from both harmful environments as well as impulsivity and poor judgement in choosing partners and lifestyles.

NIMH-funded neuroscience research is revealing brain mechanisms underlying the impulsivity, mood instability, aggression, anger, and negative emotion seen in BPD. Studies suggest that people predisposed to impulsive aggression have impaired regulation of the neural circuits that modulate emotion.10 The amygdala, a small almond-shaped structure deep inside the brain, is an important component of the circuit that regulates negative emotion. In response to signals from other brain centers indicating a perceived threat, it marshals fear and arousal. This might be more pronounced under the influence of drugs like alcohol, or stress. Areas in the front of the brain (pre-frontal area) act to dampen the activity of this circuit. Recent brain imaging studies show that individual differences in the ability to activate regions of the prefrontal cerebral cortex thought to be involved in inhibitory activity predict the ability to suppress negative emotion.11

Serotonin, norepinephrine and acetylcholine are among the chemical messengers in these circuits that play a role in the regulation of emotions, including sadness, anger, anxiety, and irritability. Drugs that enhance brain serotonin function may improve emotional symptoms in BPD. Likewise, mood-stabilizing drugs that are known to enhance the activity of GABA, the brain's major inhibitory neurotransmitter, may help people who experience BPD-like mood swings. Such brain-based vulnerabilities can be managed with help from behavioral interventions and medications, much like people manage susceptibility to diabetes or high blood pressure.7
Future Progress

Studies that translate basic findings about the neural basis of temperament, mood regulation, and cognition into clinically relevant insights which bear directly on BPD represent a growing area of NIMH-supported research. Research is also underway to test the efficacy of combining medications with behavioral treatments like DBT, and gauging the effect of childhood abuse and other stress in BPD on brain hormones. Data from the first prospective, longitudinal study of BPD, which began in the early 1990s, is expected to reveal how treatment affects the course of the illness. It will also pinpoint specific environmental factors and personality traits that predict a more favorable outcome. The Institute is also collaborating with a private foundation to help attract new researchers to develop a better understanding and better treatment for BPD.
Logged
People's Republic of Ryan

http://www.myspace.com/twilightcircus
 http://www.youtube.com/user/Ryonik
 
By the end of today, another day is gone forever. You will never get it back.
We must never let up for a second. Work harder at every single thing - Terry Manning

 You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take - Wayne Gretzky

compasspnt

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 16266
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2010, 06:26:56 pm »

RMoore wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 17:04

Guys - stay away from women like this, alluring and perhaps 'interesting' at first with all the drama and intensity - they will sap your energy, drive you to distraction with the stress, ruin your life & move on to the next 'victim'.



Q F E
Logged

MDM,

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2305
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #3 on: April 19, 2010, 09:04:21 am »

not someone to marry, for sure. I hate women who yell and fuss.

I find that if you let this type of girl talk (rant) enough without interfering, sooner or later they screw things up by themselves, stick a foot in their mouth and show who 'they' really are with no effort from you.. this is a good example of how silence will bring out the hidden 'dark side', insecurities, jealousy etc.
Logged
I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy .. in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry and music.
John Adams (1735-1826) 2nd President, United States

Jon Hodgson

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1854
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #4 on: April 19, 2010, 10:23:52 am »

One part of this story seems suspect to me.

He said he told her he was going, and phoned her to say goodbye. I've been involved with a girl who I would say must have been bipolar, and get her at a positive or negative moment that sort of information wouldn't have escaped her... it's either "I'll miss you darling" or "how can you go away and leave me here alone you bastard".

Logged

Taproot

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 713
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #5 on: April 19, 2010, 10:50:02 am »

Someone is suffering from "The Craaaaaazeeeeeez".  Shocked

I had a chick (bunny cooker) do  this crap to me, except she knew exactly where I was and I WAS avoiding her. Cary Hudson from Blue Mountain wrote a song about it and it nearly made one of their records.

"Little Reed, Little Reed....Little Reed, Little Reed! With his red headed witches and crazy bitches.....thinkin' with the wrong head again."
Logged
Jeffrey Reed
Taproot Audio Design
Oxford, Mississippi
www.taprootaudiodesign.com
www.myspace.com/taprootaudio

"That boy's so dumb, he thinks the Mexican border pays rent!" -Foghorn Leghorn

seedyunderbelly.com

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2465
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #6 on: April 19, 2010, 11:15:20 am »

compasspnt wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 17:26

RMoore wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 17:04

Guys - stay away from women like this, alluring and perhaps 'interesting' at first with all the drama and intensity - they will sap your energy, drive you to distraction with the stress, ruin your life & move on to the next 'victim'.



Q F E



Unfortunately I was roasted hard early on by this same type.  Ryan's warning was astute and spot on.   I did think it was funny though__

@ Jon,   I thought about it being suspect too  though she seems wild enough to forget..  Bars...guys....etc.

Dominick's funny Dan the Man link seems to apply too!

rollmottle

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1246
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #7 on: April 19, 2010, 11:36:59 am »

I'm not sure I would question the mental health of the girl in this case. Just seems like a young girl in-love who also happens to be a complete idiot.
Logged
SENTRALL Sound East
My SoundCloud | Twitter | www.sentrall.com

Barry Hufker

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8228
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #8 on: April 19, 2010, 11:44:10 am »

No, I know the type.  She's nuts.  Sleeping with another guy out of spite is proof enough this is not a lasting relationship.

Logged

ssltech

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 4780
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #9 on: April 19, 2010, 01:23:06 pm »

Been there, done that, never going back again.

When Courtney Love thinks your GF is 'a whack job', it's time to take notice...

Unfortunately it's a little bit like owning a temperamental older Ferrari... the rewards are exciting, but the ultimate cost (and I don't simply mean financial cost) can be frightful.

Logged
MDM (maxdimario) wrote on Fri, 16 November 2007 21:36

I have the feeling that I have more experience in my little finger than you do in your whole body about audio electronics..

rankus

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 5560
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #10 on: April 19, 2010, 09:04:54 pm »

compasspnt wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 15:26

RMoore wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 17:04

Guys - stay away from women like this, alluring and perhaps 'interesting' at first with all the drama and intensity - they will sap your energy, drive you to distraction with the stress, ruin your life & move on to the next 'victim'.



Q F E



So... You've met my ex then?

Logged
Rick Welin - Clark Drive Studios http://www.myspace.com/clarkdrivestudios

Ive done stuff I'm not proud of.. and the stuff I am proud of is disgusting ~ Moe Sizlack

"There is no crisis in energy, the crisis is in imagination" ~ Buckminster Fuller

compasspnt

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 16266
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #11 on: April 19, 2010, 10:08:14 pm »

rankus wrote on Mon, 19 April 2010 21:04

compasspnt wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 15:26

RMoore wrote on Sun, 18 April 2010 17:04

Guys - stay away from women like this, alluring and perhaps 'interesting' at first with all the drama and intensity - they will sap your energy, drive you to distraction with the stress, ruin your life & move on to the next 'victim'.



Q F E



So... You've met my ex then?




I will guarantee you...

You Don't Know Ex.
Logged

Wireline

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 409
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #12 on: April 19, 2010, 10:15:57 pm »

I know ex.  Two of em.

First one could have very easily been the motivation behind the classic tune "If I'd a Killed You When I Wanted, I'd Be Out By Now"
Logged
Ken Morgan
Wireline Studio
Midland, Texas
www.wirelinestudio.com

Barry Hufker

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 8228
Re: Girlfriend does not realize boyfriend is in Europe for two weeks-
« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2010, 10:45:29 pm »

Sounds like a new thread is needed: Ex Files


You knew that was coming eventually...


Logged
Pages: [1]   Go Up