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[pete andrews]

i usually don't like to share these kind of emails i get with the world... but this one is just too good. this guy's has been hitting me up every year or so since '99 to come in and record... this is his latest inquiry. (i've ****'d out all names)

enjoy!!!

"Hey Pete,

Just checking on to see if you can do some recordings of me.    I was also hoping to sing along to some of the artists like Jay-Z, Chris Brown, Kayne West, Flo Rida, Pink, Soulja Boy, Britney Spears, Danity Kane, Young Money, Jonas Brothers etc.  I have been really practicing and think I have gotten a lot better since our last recordings.  I even have written some of my own stuff, which has a variety of rap to country.  My rap name is ***** so if you hear of anyone in the industry referring about me let me know.  

Also what I was really hoping to do is a couple of music videos but am unsure if that is your thing.  I have a couple of back up dancers all lined up and ready to go.  But am unsure if your basement would be the ideal place to record something like this, but your livingroom may work a little better.  2 of the back up dancers will be in gold bikinis and the one guy has a pair of gold pants and a bunch of gold chains.  We have practiced a bunch of times and are really good.  

Let me know when you are free so we can record these beats and dont worry I have to  money to pay you I am not looking for a free ride.  

****"

-pete

[Roadster]

Well.....there ARE the two back up dancers! (and in your living room even.) Might be worth moving the TV.

[Skullsessions]

That seriously reads like something one of my friends would send me just to yank my chain.

Reminds me the time a girl came in a couple of years ago and "sang" over a dance track that she "wrote", called FIND YOUR GROOVE.

The music sounded like it was a demo song off of a cheap casio synth.  I'm 90% sure it was.  But she brought it on CD, so I didn't question.

She couldn't sing anywhere near in tune, nor anywhere near the groove.  Which was pretty ironic.  There were no amount of retakes or pitch correction that would have fixed the problem.  It was what it was, so I just let her finish and called it good when SHE said it was.

When she was done she told me...."Now.  I just need you to make that sound like a good singer in a good studio."

When I told her that I didn't really know what that meant, she told me...."You know, put some reverb on it."

[compasspnt]

Send these session to me.

I am bored, and need something to do...

[Spindrift]

Depending on how busy you were, this session could be done and filed away in the "freakiest session I've ever been involved with" file!

[pete andrews]

compasspnt wrote on Wed, 13 January 2010 15:04

Send these session to me. I am bored, and need something to do...

no problem,
i will give him your contact info terry....
just make sure your living room is cleared out a bit.

-pete

[arconaut]

I'm sorry to say this, but I'm pretty sure the rap name "*****" is already taken.

[jwhynot]

The dynamic show ever been gave.

[C.Cash]

Lol.

I got this today!

"Hi Cliff,

How's it going? Hope all's well.

I was wondering if me, ******* and ******** might be able to audition for you one day. We won't take up much of your time. if you could just give us 1 hour that would be great. If you like what we are doing maybe we can work out something where we can be available as a back up rock band for any of your singer song writer who are looking for guitar, bass and drum.

*****"


How should I respond?

[Fibes]

I spend way more time fielding these calls and emails in my town.

I answered a call (forwarded to my cell) to the studio at 9am last Sunday, he asked my rates, what my phone number was and said he'd call back. At 11:30am he called back and insisted he was ready to record at noon. When I told him the studio was booked until the 30th of this month he became very agitated and hung up. At 12:15 during lunch he called again, heard my voice and hung up.

I love people.


Terry I have a record you could master if you're bored, Dave Schools' half brother plays on it.

[jetbase]

C.Cash wrote on Thu, 14 January 2010 09:26

Lol. I got this today! "Hi Cliff, How's it going? Hope all's well. I was wondering if me, ******* and ******** might be able to audition for you one day. We won't take up much of your time. if you could just give us 1 hour that would be great. If you like what we are doing maybe we can work out something where we can be available as a back up rock band for any of your singer song writer who are looking for guitar, bass and drum. *****" How should I respond?

Tell them the best way to audition is to invite you to a gig or send you a demo. No demo? You can provide that service! Wait, is this from Terry? He should have a demo.

[Greg Dixon]

I had someone wanting to book 2 hrs to record a band. I asked what they expected to do in 2 hrs. "10 songs. It's a 40 minute set, so that gives us time to play each song twice."

One of the first albums I did mentions it was recorded in 24 hrs. A few years latter a guy rang wanting to book a 24 hr block. I told him I didn't do that and he mentioned this album. I told him it wasn't 24hrs straight through. In fact I think they never did more than about 4hrs at a time. The guy was really disappointed and just hung up.

[Daniel Farris]

"Do you charge for set-up time?"

DF

[Blackie Pawless]

Late 80's, large SSL room with many big budget/hit records credits... I'm not an employee, just comping a vocal late one night alone.  Phone rings.....
Me:  Hello
Them: What is it cost to record something there and how many drums you have?
Me: Usually around $2000 a day I think. There is no house kit. Session guys and bands tend to want to use their own these days.
Them: Sounds like a jive ass hillbilly rip-off to me
Me:  Uh...I guess you're right
Them: Click/ dialtone

[Skullsessions]

compasspnt wrote on Wed, 13 January 2010 14:04

Send these session to me. I am bored, and need something to do...

I'm certain I no longer have the session.

But I DO have a copy of the song on disc.  I keep it on my desk and I play it for guys when they're having a bad day - just to remind them of how much worse it could be.  And it gets requested quite often as people return to do more work.  It's become a bit of a cult classic around here.

It really is so unlistenable that you can't stop listening.  It's a train wreck that just gets worse and worse along a 3 minute time-line.  It's pretty tragic.

Shall I post a link?  Anyone?